Archive for ‘Flow’

August 8, 2012

Way too long ago…..

by victorymoon

It has been ages since I did a post; not sure why… just Is!

So today, as I was reading a blog or two, it occurred to me it was time to update a bit.

Been wondering if I have any information to share, and honestly, not really.

It has been so hot here, 103+, most days, that my motivation is slim. Although, I have finally obtained two 4x4x10 ft treated posts and two bags of quikcrete, and got one post in the ground the other night.

Working in the early morn or mid to late eve is best these days… does not provide much time, yet, enough to get a few simple tasks done.

I am currently putting the posts in the ground near the rig to provide some shade. I gave a co-worker a used desk top computer and she gifted me with a mammoth sized black mesh shade cloth! A wonderful and needed addition to my spot.

Now I am devising a structure to place the cloth upon.

I want it to be multi- purpose, of course, and when time and money permit, to become a structure with a tin roof on it. Maybe work in some walls and windows too.

I have been collecting building materials when they become available, from job, and when I can find a simple inexpensive way to bring them home. So far I have 5 double pane windows, two bi-fold doors, a hollow core door, and have my sites on some screen inserts that I am hoping to grab up for close to nothing.

Storing them is also an issue, since the old trailer is full of leaks and the floor is rotting away. These issues were present when I moved up here, and the reason I began to pull the trailer apart. Then, as I realized I needed storage, I stopped the tear down and started using it instead.

My cottage plans are still on hold, due to many reasons… One being, energy to build, another, money, and now, as I am in a holding pattern, I find the spot I picked is maybe not the best area to build in.

I had planned to place the cottage, up on a deck, on posts, since the ground is sandy loam and shifts so easily. Plus, I had the field all staked out, and as I watch and walk the area, I find the heat unbearable!!!

Too much open area! It was a good idea for passive solar for the winter, when I was in full planning mode, yet, now that summer is in full swing… Too much Sun! So.. have been re-thinking, re-planning… Closer to the Persimmon trees will be better… and maybe.. maybe dig into the ground so that I can use some of the natural ground cooling too.

Not sure how much digging I can do, yet, maybe at least enough to get One room built into the ground. The whole plan has really changed, since the drought, and if this is the weather pattern to be, then plans must be made to work “with” nature, instead of adding AC and all that other stuff.

No recent photos; seems the camera and I need to become good friends again.

Advertisements
March 3, 2011

A Day Off…

by victorymoon

A friend of mine moved to Mexico many moons ago; she picked a place, basically, in the jungle. As she got started there, she encountered many interesting new ways of life. She would write about them, now and then.

As I have recently realized.. life in the woods is a comparison study, to her life in the jungle.

A note of thoughts about one of my days here, I directed to her….

Dana, Dear,

When I used to read of your adventures, after you first moved south, I used to read, sometimes laugh now… I relate!
Today… since the wind is too high to burn my overflowing trash, I chose to wash clothes.
Hook hose to washer, hook hose pipe to washer, clean out washer of debris from cedar tree over washer, plug in washer, turn water on and attempt to avoid the spray from the leaky connections, avoid puddle forming from leaky connections, sort clothes in trunk of car (too stinky to leave inside RV), carry clothes 15 feet to washer, do not overfill or old washer will not churn (about 7 shirts or 4 pairs of pants), keep checking washer to make sure it is churning, if not, hand stir several times, when clothes have finished cycle, place in basket in wheelbarrow, wheel to clothes line 40 or so feet away, attempt to keep clothes clean while hanging, hang high enough dog will not pull clothes down, hope wind is not too strong to blow clothes off line, hope too much traffic does not pass on dirt road or more dust will cling to newly washed clothes now so exhausted with all the wash from one load, take break!

Forget the story about putting together shelves in storage, too tired to even think about writing all that… used the f word a lot!

Near the Persimmon Patch...

Nuff said!

Question: Am I a Pioneer Woman yet?

**I have now updated my system, since the writing of this. The leaks are fixed, so no more wasting water, or having to avoid spray or puddles. Also, moved my drying line many yards away from the road, which takes away the worry of dust from the traffic. The new area gets plenty of sun and breeze, is in the area where I am now plotting to put a cottage, and someday, I will move the washer to that area.. after digging a plumbing line and a ditch for electrical conduit.

Life in the Woods… I Like It!!

Tags: , ,
December 21, 2010

Transition & Completion

by victorymoon

MuM

December 14th, at 1143pm, of this year, Betty Jean Ridenour Seymour died.

How odd and inaccurate that statement seems to me.

The above person held many titles, one being, mother. My mother.

I called her Mum, aka Ancient One. I also called her Ladybug.

As I felt the cold body that lay still in the hospital bed, I knew, Mum was no longer in there. She had shifted back into spirit form and was moving on.. to ? ….

She and I had an agreement; as soon as she could, she would return to this earthly dimension, in spirit form, with the goal of touching me on the head and letting me know she was good in the whereever.

We just felt this would be a way of comfort for both of us. See, Jean was ready to move on, her body was failing to hold life energy, yet, her fear of the unknown was attempting to keep her grounded on this rock.

We had many discussions concerning the unknown, the subject of fear, the knowing that death is part of the life cycle. None of these made the process easy, just easier, for me to let her go anyway.

As she lay in the bed, before the shift, resting in a painless sleep assisted by drugs, I sat beside and pondered.

Was the act of passing an act of completion as well as transition? As the end was near, was it truly the end? or soon to be another begining?

From the moment I felt her chest, to prove to myself I was seeing the truth, that it no longer was rising and falling… I felt such peace.

Jean Mum, in earth body form, no longer felt pain, cold feet, breathless…

What a relief that must be for her spirit…

As I walked out into the hall to summon a nurse, to confirm, I walked with hesitation. My feelings were so joyful; was that okay? Would someone seeing my face, knowing my mother had just died, understand the look of serenity I held about me? Did anyone else understand how the body that lay in that room had gone through so much stress and turmoil and now it had peace?

Earlier that day, Mum and I had begun singing in the angels, to walk her over.

A son of mine, Christopher, who had walked over back in 93, showed up with an outstretched hand. A friend of Jeans, Evonne, who had walked over a few years ago, also showed up with an outstretched hand.

We could feel the room full of joy and peace, as angels crowded in to flutter their wings and help lift Jean’s Spirit up and away.

I have not been one to call upon angels very often; so grand they did not hold it against me.  Not sure what we would have done without them.

December 21, 2010

Heavy

by victorymoon

Despair says I cannot lift that weight. Happiness says I do not have to.

-Unknown

One Day at a time....

This remnant was present when I first began cleaning and clearing this piece of land in 2009. It was very heavy and the wheels would no longer turn. Steering was also impossible.. A task that seemed way beyond my capabilities. Each day I would walk out and approach the object, mentally prepared to move it. Each day, I did move it, some days, just inches. Other days, I would have the energy and the wind to help me and get it moved several feet. At the end of two months, the bike was relocated out of site and awaited removal.

When the “metal guy” arrived, he picked it up, put it on the trailer, and hauled it off. Yes, just like that.. It was gone.

When I stood there watching, I wondered why I had gone through so much, each day, to get it moved to a different location when it was just going to leave eventually anyway.

Now, I know… It was a beginning for me to understand what my power of intention can accomplish.

The bike was fine where it sat; it had been there for decades. I was the one that wanted it out of the way, out of my site. I had projects to do in that area and the bike sat as a hindrance for other plans I had. So, one day at a time, I got done what I wanted done. Only later, watching someone else, do the same, with so little effort, did it occur to me.. It is all about intent and inspiration and belief and creation. The bike did not care, the “metal guy” had no concern where it had been versus where it was when he arrived. Only me and my thoughts about the thing.

Most of life is designed this way, me thinks… and most of life can be accomplished, One day, at a time…

Tags:
December 21, 2010

Notes 2 Self

by victorymoon

The better I feel about myself, the less I need you to be different….

This was a quote I found in an email the other day, which gave me pause for thought.

How do I feel about myself,  and is how I feel about myself, reflected in the mirror I use when I see others?


Tags: ,
December 21, 2010

Happiness Is….

by victorymoon

Happiness is…..

when I was a child, in grade school, I was in glee club.
It was one of my favorite classes; something I looked forward to and had a passion for. We would sit in our little chairs in a large room, with our music teacher, Ms. Hall, and get handed our sheet music, and then we would practice. Practice and practice and practice. Often, other children would get frustrated with glee club, or the practicing. Some even joined just to get out of class, yet, not me. I felt so pleased to be able to have time to simply sing. Sing and sing and sing.
When we would have a performance, it was an exciting time. We would practice while standing on the risers, in the auditorium, and belt out our songs. Then, eventually, the big day would come. We would stand in front of the entire school and sing our collection of songs. Then, that night, another performance, this time, made up of parents, relatives, friends and neighbors.
I was in my glory, while on “stage”. Yet, it was not really the time in the spot light that drew me, it was truly the music, the songs, the notes on paper transferred to voice and instrument. The voices, working together.
One of my favorite songs that plays in my mind, now and again, is one from the musical “You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown”.

CHARLIE BROWN:
(Spoken)
I’m so happy. That little red-headed girl dropped her pencil. It has teeth marks all over it. She nibbles her pencil.
She’s human! It hasn’t been such a bad day after all.

(Sung)
HAPPINESS IS FINDING A PENCIL.

SNOOPY:
PIZZA WITH SAUSAGE

LINUS:
TELLING THE TIME.

SCHROEDER:
HAPPINESS IS LEARNING TO WHISTLE.

LINUS:
TYING YOUR SHOE FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME.

SALLY:
HAPPINESS IS PLAYING THE DRUM IN YOUR OWN SCHOOL BAND.

CHARLIE BROWN:
AND HAPPINESS IS WALKING HAND IN HAND.
HAPPINESS IS TWO KINDS OF ICE CREAM.

LUCY:
KNOWING A SECRET.

SCHROEDER:
CLIMBING A TREE.

CHARLIE BROWN:
HAPPINESS IS FIVE DIFFERENT CRAYONS.

SCHROEDER:
CATCHING A FIREFLY.
SETTING HIM FREE.

CHARLIE BROWN:
HAPPINESS IS BEING ALONE EVERY NOW AND THEN.

ALL:
AND HAPPINESS IS COMING HOME AGAIN.

CHARLIE BROWN:
HAPPINESS IS MORNING AND EVENING,
DAY TIME AND NIGHT TIME TOO.
FOR HAPPINESS IS ANYONE AND ANYTHING AT ALL
THAT’S LOVED BY YOU.

LINUS:
HAPPINESS IS HAVING A SISTER.

LUCY:
SHARING A SANDWICH.

LUCY AND LINUS:
GETTING ALONG.

ALL:
HAPPINESS IS SINGING TOGETHER WHEN DAY IS THROUGH,
AND HAPPINESS IS THOSE WHO SING WITH YOU.
HAPPINESS IS MORNING AND EVENING,
DAYTIME AND NIGHTTIME TOO.

CHARLIE BROWN:
FOR HAPPINESS IS ANYONE AND ANYTHING AT ALL
THAT’S LOVED BY YOU.

(The cast filters out, waving “good night” to Charlie Brown, but Lucy stays, and and stands in silence for a moment before finally saying:)

LUCY:
You’re a good man, Charlie Brown.

– He smiles, and the lights go down –

These days, my versions of happiness differ a bit, yet, are mostly as simple and the ones sung about by the characters in the musical.

My personal song might be something like…

Happiness is…
A cup of warm beverage
A fresh clove cigar
A shine from the Sun

Seeing some fireflies
Finding a new tree
Petting my Ru

Happiness is…
Clean hair free of tangles
Clean clothes to choose from
A deep hot long bath

So, I am in the process of making a list, of what happiness is for me now. For I am at a crossroads again; mum has transitioned and no longer needs my assistance. I am free to leave this area, or stay put. If I leave, what would I be leaving for, and if I stay, what will I be staying for. These are the questions before me now, on my plate, so to speak.
Good orderly direction is what I am seeking, so a list of reasons feels very sound.

Feels right to share this quote from a daily newsletter I receive via email –

“Those of us on the path of personal and spiritual growth have a tendency to analyze our unhappiness in order to find the causes and make improvements. But it is just as important, if not more so, to analyze our happiness. Since we have the ability to rise above and observe our emotions, we can recognize when we are feeling joyful and content. Then we can harness the power of the moment by savoring our feelings and taking time to be grateful for them.

Recognition is the first step in creating change, therefore recognizing what it feels like to be happy is the first step toward sustaining happiness in our lives. We can examine how joy feels in our bodies and what thoughts run through our minds in times of bliss. Without diminishing its power, we can retrace our steps to discover what may have put us in this frame of mind, and then we can take note of the choices we’ve made while there. We might realize that we are generally more giving and forgiving when there’s a smile on our face, or that we are more likely to laugh off small annoyances and the actions of others when they don’t resonate with our light mood.

Once we know what it feels like and can identify some of the triggers and are aware of our actions, we can recreate that happiness when we are feeling low. Knowing that like attracts like, we can pull ourselves out of a blue mood by focusing on joy. We might find that forcing ourselves to be giving and forgiving, even when it doesn’t seem to come naturally, helps us to reconnect with the joy that usually precedes it. If we can identify a song, a picture, or a pet as a happiness trigger, we can use them as tools to recapture joy if we are having trouble finding it. By focusing our energy on analyzing happiness and all that it encompasses, we feed, nurture, and attract more of it into our lives, eventually making a habit of happiness. “ Daily OM

“Who am I? What am I doing here? How can I best serve? What do I want to become, create, accomplish in this life?”

December 9, 2010

Dis Embodied Dis Assembled

by victorymoon

A feeling just registered in my being; a feeling of being disembodied. As though my energy and my body, are becoming separate.

My time lately has been spent, busing myself and possessions, back and forth between “the woods” and “town”. Town being were Ancient One resides, and is currently, in hospital.

Ancient One is my mum; a precious soul, who inhabits a body with a chronic illness, that is sapping strength and energy. A One, is 85, somewhat settled, about leaving this planet, and yet, fearful of what the next realm holds.

For the past few weeks, when I am in her presence, one distinct phrase keeps repeating itself in my mind. “She is fading”.

When the feeling of being disembodied entered my mind this morning, so did the concept that, maybe, that phrase I have been hearing around A One, is not about her. Maybe it is about myself.

Then a second thought rode in; maybe the feeling is relative to A One and to myself.

That as her energy fades from this dimension, that part of her in me, is going also.

Tired yet Peaceful

Is that a possibility, or a probability.

Do “we” actually feel the life energy connection of another being, who we are deeply connected to, disconnect, when they flow from the present dimension of existence, into another?

I know that the chakra system has strands that connect us, like umbilical cords, to other people who we create the relationship with. Individuals in a sexual relationship, for example, even a causal one, create a strand, a link up, with each other. The more often, the stronger the strand.

So, with all that in mind, as the being that is transitioning, fades….. the link gets weaker? The strand has less pull on the other person?

This is an area I have not done much study on, and now I will have to. Although, with everything going on just now, I may have to leave it alone, except for this post about the feeling.

If anyone has further info on this type of situation, please write. Maybe someone who has had someone close to them slowly die, has experienced something of this sort.

Although it is a bit of a morbid topic, I certainly did not start out with that intention. Just so fascinating as the concepts started to flow into my mind this morning, that I felt it must be for the blog page. Why not, right? Right!