Posts tagged ‘transition’

December 21, 2010

Transition & Completion

by victorymoon

MuM

December 14th, at 1143pm, of this year, Betty Jean Ridenour Seymour died.

How odd and inaccurate that statement seems to me.

The above person held many titles, one being, mother. My mother.

I called her Mum, aka Ancient One. I also called her Ladybug.

As I felt the cold body that lay still in the hospital bed, I knew, Mum was no longer in there. She had shifted back into spirit form and was moving on.. to ? ….

She and I had an agreement; as soon as she could, she would return to this earthly dimension, in spirit form, with the goal of touching me on the head and letting me know she was good in the whereever.

We just felt this would be a way of comfort for both of us. See, Jean was ready to move on, her body was failing to hold life energy, yet, her fear of the unknown was attempting to keep her grounded on this rock.

We had many discussions concerning the unknown, the subject of fear, the knowing that death is part of the life cycle. None of these made the process easy, just easier, for me to let her go anyway.

As she lay in the bed, before the shift, resting in a painless sleep assisted by drugs, I sat beside and pondered.

Was the act of passing an act of completion as well as transition? As the end was near, was it truly the end? or soon to be another begining?

From the moment I felt her chest, to prove to myself I was seeing the truth, that it no longer was rising and falling… I felt such peace.

Jean Mum, in earth body form, no longer felt pain, cold feet, breathless…

What a relief that must be for her spirit…

As I walked out into the hall to summon a nurse, to confirm, I walked with hesitation. My feelings were so joyful; was that okay? Would someone seeing my face, knowing my mother had just died, understand the look of serenity I held about me? Did anyone else understand how the body that lay in that room had gone through so much stress and turmoil and now it had peace?

Earlier that day, Mum and I had begun singing in the angels, to walk her over.

A son of mine, Christopher, who had walked over back in 93, showed up with an outstretched hand. A friend of Jeans, Evonne, who had walked over a few years ago, also showed up with an outstretched hand.

We could feel the room full of joy and peace, as angels crowded in to flutter their wings and help lift Jean’s Spirit up and away.

I have not been one to call upon angels very often; so grand they did not hold it against me.  Not sure what we would have done without them.

December 9, 2010

Dis Embodied Dis Assembled

by victorymoon

A feeling just registered in my being; a feeling of being disembodied. As though my energy and my body, are becoming separate.

My time lately has been spent, busing myself and possessions, back and forth between “the woods” and “town”. Town being were Ancient One resides, and is currently, in hospital.

Ancient One is my mum; a precious soul, who inhabits a body with a chronic illness, that is sapping strength and energy. A One, is 85, somewhat settled, about leaving this planet, and yet, fearful of what the next realm holds.

For the past few weeks, when I am in her presence, one distinct phrase keeps repeating itself in my mind. “She is fading”.

When the feeling of being disembodied entered my mind this morning, so did the concept that, maybe, that phrase I have been hearing around A One, is not about her. Maybe it is about myself.

Then a second thought rode in; maybe the feeling is relative to A One and to myself.

That as her energy fades from this dimension, that part of her in me, is going also.

Tired yet Peaceful

Is that a possibility, or a probability.

Do “we” actually feel the life energy connection of another being, who we are deeply connected to, disconnect, when they flow from the present dimension of existence, into another?

I know that the chakra system has strands that connect us, like umbilical cords, to other people who we create the relationship with. Individuals in a sexual relationship, for example, even a causal one, create a strand, a link up, with each other. The more often, the stronger the strand.

So, with all that in mind, as the being that is transitioning, fades….. the link gets weaker? The strand has less pull on the other person?

This is an area I have not done much study on, and now I will have to. Although, with everything going on just now, I may have to leave it alone, except for this post about the feeling.

If anyone has further info on this type of situation, please write. Maybe someone who has had someone close to them slowly die, has experienced something of this sort.

Although it is a bit of a morbid topic, I certainly did not start out with that intention. Just so fascinating as the concepts started to flow into my mind this morning, that I felt it must be for the blog page. Why not, right? Right!